Can you ever go back home? No, of course not, but you can go back to where you used to live and visit your friends and family. Yeah, I thought so, too.
My daughter, in Cincinnati, was having her big 60th birthday last week, so I decided that since I was there for the original occasion and most of the others, I would go spend this one with her and her family.
Not that her birthday wasn’t important enough for me to travel, but there were a couple of other things to consider also. Like I had a really big need to gamble in Lawrenceburg, Indiana.
I don’t do slot machines and anyway, there is practically no gambling in Texas. Imagine that! Just a few Indian slot casinos.
And then there was my quest for a certain flavor of salad dressing that I had previously only been able to find at Kroger. Kroger stores are not in Texas yet, but they are trying. I had to make a Kroger run while visiting. And my restaurant obsession.
It has been less than two years since I have flown, but some things have drastically changed, which I will address later. It seems like leaving Texas is nice and easy, but getting back is another story. Stay tuned to the end.
My daughter picked me up after my six hour trip and we headed to my first restaurant obsession, Steak ‘n Shake where we met up with the granddaughters.
That was a great way to start my trip. Good thing, because things began to happen the next day. It went from nice to WTH is going on here.
I met up with my friend Bonnie from Eaton on Wednesday morning at Bob Evans in Franklin. Bob Evans was one of the restaurants on my list of things you can’t get in San Antonio. We had a great breakfast and conversation for about two hours. Okay, Bob’s is off my list.
Next obsession was a trip to Kroger to get my favorite salad dressing, only available from Kroger, at least I can’t find it anywhere else. I found that pretty easy and bought four bottles to smuggle home.
Guess it wasn’t smuggling, but it seemed like it. I had to put it in my checked baggage. That afternoon, we went to see where my granddaughters lived and then had a nice dinner and I snuggled in for my big gambling trip.
Thursday morning we hit another of my favorite, not allowed in Texas, places for breakfast, Frisch’s. Great as usual except for the coffee but still crossed off my list.
That afternoon, it was pretty easy to get to the casino and I only made two wrong turns but still got there in time to lose half my money and head home.
But it was part of the reason for coming to Ohio so not a loss at all.
Friday, my last day, I had plans to meet up with my college roommate for lunch. We were going to meet near her house, but with road construction everywhere I needed help from my grandkids.
They were born with a phone attached to their hands as you probably know from your own experience. They tried to help me but I need to see a real Google map and they don’t have printers and can use the phone for directions.
I immediately removed them from my will and sent a text to Susie and she came to my side of town and we had lunch at Chick-fil-A. Not on my list since they are everywhere in Texas but still a good visit.
That night we celebrated Andrea’s birthday at a nice restaurant and I headed to pack my suitcase and get to bed. My flight was scheduled for 7 a.m. on Saturday .
This is where things start to happen. It appears that in the last 18 months since I have flown, Southwest has decided that their customers will soon be flying the plane.
They are starting by having you not only check in but print out your own bag ticket. So, first thing, I’m lost. I did manage to find the kiosk but had no idea what to do. Of course, even children as young as 3 were printing out tags for their parents.
Finally, a helpful Air Force retiree and his wife helped me out with that. After printing the tag, I was supposed to leave my bag at the counter, but since I was already confused, I dragged it along with me on the 8 mile hike to the TSA check-in.
As I was standing in line I realized that nobody else had a tagged bag. That’s when I realized that I had forgotten the part about taking the bag to the desk. Memory of an 82 year old is not good.
Of course, my bag got pulled out and searched and the 13 year old TSA agent took my salad dressing because he was convinced it was an explosive device. Damn! First, I lost my money and now my salad dressing.
Ever since I went for my checkup at the doctor, I have been getting a little short of breath on occasion. What better place to test that theory than in an airport when you have to walk 16 miles from drop off to gate.
During my plane change in Atlanta, I could use the underground train system but it was 4 miles to get to it and 6 miles to get back to the gate.
On my way home my gate in Chicago was next door to the one I was going to get on to go home so no problem there, but I was hungry and wanted to get breakfast.
No McDonalds in Midway Airport, but they did have a breakfast burrito for $15.99. So, no breakfast for me. I just ate the horrible cookies from the first part of my trip.
No peanuts on planes anymore. If anyone in your ancestry ever had an allergy to peanuts, then no airline will ever serve them again. Too bad, it is just part of the whole flying experience.
I pity the G and X and the whole woke generation. They will never know the thrill of having peanuts on an airplane.
I finally made it home and Gibbs gave me a big kiss but otherwise he has been calm. Maybe he has shortness of breath also. He doesn’t seem like his old self, but maybe he was just stressed about me being gone, or maybe he was stressed about me coming home. Only time will tell.
And just FYI when I unpacked I found one bottle of salad dressing. Guess the TSA kid wasn’t too alert, since I got one by him! Ha-ha!
Kaye Brown is a former resident of Preble County who now resides in Texas. Reach Kaye Brown at [email protected].
